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PostHeaderIcon Top 100 Google’s Best April Fool Events

Google is well known for its April Fool’s Day “product launches”. But many of them are amazingly complicated, with multiple pages, FAQs and complex screen grabs. These aren’t just hastily prepared jokes that were thought of the day before like the weak attempts by numerous other firms.

So we’ve listed our 10 favourite April Fool’s day Google faux-launches. Gmail isn’t here – despite it seeming like a hoax at the time and being launched on 1 April, that’s proved to be no joke. Though we bet someone at Google was enjoying one at the time.
1. Google MentalPlex

After two years of existence, Google decided it was time to have a play with what we’d believe it could do. MentalPlex involved a standard Google search page, complete with a spinning, eye-popping circle that you were meant to peer into to read your mind and determine what you are searching for. A vision of the future? Google even published a full fake FAQ on MentalPlex, too. To be fair though, all the search results were April Fool-related.

2. Google GBall

From Google Australia this year, the Gball page is probably even more amusing than CADIE (see below). “This weekend around the country, the gBall(BETA) will change Australian rules football as we know it.” The ball can be found by Google technology when it’s lost as well as perform other handy Aussie Rules functions: “gBall vibrates if player agents or talent scouts want to speak to you…find your lost gBall online using Google Maps.”

3. The PageRank reveal

A particular favourite of the TechRadar team. After continuing speculation about its PageRank technology, Google decided it would tell us all what was going on. PigeonRank was the result.

“By collecting flocks of pigeons in dense clusters, Google is able to process search queries at speeds superior to traditional search engines, which typically rely on birds of prey, brooding hens or slow-moving waterfowl to do their relevance rankings.”

“When a search query is submitted to Google, it is routed to a data coop where monitors flash result pages at blazing speeds. When a relevant result is observed by one of the pigeons in the cluster, it strikes a rubber-coated steel bar with its beak, which assigns the page a PigeonRank value of one. For each peck, the PigeonRank increases. Those pages receiving the most pecks, are returned at the top of the user’s results page with the other results displayed in pecking order.” Top marks for ingenuity, at least.

4. Google Gulp

The idea behind this fake 2005 beverage was a rip-off of the concept behind the original Gmail – that you had to be ‘invited’ to get it by somebody who’d already bought it. “You can pick up your own supply of this ‘limited release’ product simply by turning in a used Gulp Cap at your local grocery store.

“How to get a Gulp Cap? Well, if you know someone who’s already been “gulped,” they can give you one. And if you don’t know anyone who can give you one, don’t worry – that just means you aren’t cool. But very, very (very!) soon, you will be.” Naturally it was a beta…
5. Google TiSP

Possibly the most ridiculous Google fool, though PigeonRank was pretty close. Google’s Toilet Internet Service Provider was intended to take advantage of sewage piping to bring 8Mbps broadband to your toilet “vacuum-sealed to prevent water damage”. The user would simply drop a cable down the toilet, then flush it. “Mac and Linux support coming soon.” The how it works page about ‘Going with the flow’ is also worth a read.

6. Gmail Paper

Google changed the log-in page for Gmail for this one. “Everyone loves Gmail,” read the blurb on the page. “But not everyone loves email, or the digital era. What ever happened to stamps, filing cabinets, and the mailman? Well, you asked for it, and it’s here. We’re bringing it back.”

Another theme with Gmail’s fools is that they tend to include amusing fake testimonials on the page. “It’s paper, plain and easy. I sometimes find myself wondering: what will Google think of next? Cardboard?”

7. Gmail Custom Time

Another one involving Gmail was more subtle. A new red link in the top right of users’ inboxes announced a new feature – Gmail Custom Time. It supposedly enabled users to pre-date messages but “you’ll only be able to send email back until 1 April, 2004, the day we launched Gmail. If we were to let you send an email from Gmail before Gmail existed, well, that would be like hanging out with your parents before you were born - crazy talk. It also claimed “Gmail utilizes an e-flux capacitor” – we think Doc Brown would have something to say about that.

8. Blogger “Google Weblogs (beta)

This ‘enhancement’ for Blogger was billed as “the next revolution in personal publishing”. The premise was that Google would use its algorithms to put your best content at the top of your blog page. “Even if your later work goes downhill your previous posts will still shine. Unsure of what to post about? Just click “I’m Feeling Lucky” and we’ll “take care” of the rest!”

Some of the features actually sounded appealing. “No more template languages to mess with or sidebars to get right. Our advanced Google algorithms automatically populate your blog’s sidebar with the most relevant possible content.”

9. Google Romance

From the year after comes this gem. Increasingly Google’s fools have become more complex, with extra pages and references elsewhere to support the theme. Romance said that “dating is a search problem. Solve it with Google”.

Google also isn’t afraid to poke fun at itself and how it does things. “Using our Soulmate Search, [you’ll] get back search results that could, in theory, include the love of your life. Then we’ll send you both on a Contextual Date, which we’ll pay for while delivering to you relevant ads that we and our advertising partners think will help produce the dating results you’re looking for.”

10. CADIE. Or is it MySpace?

Last night, Google launched Cadie, the world’s first “artificial intelligence” tasked-array system. “Tonight we’re pleased to announce that just moments ago, the world’s first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity (CADIE) was switched on and began performing some initial functions.”

“Earlier today, for instance, CADIE deduced from a quick scan of the visual segment of the social web a set of online design principles from which she derived this intriguing homepage.” Enough said.

CADIE has also seeped into other ‘announcements’ today, including this one from Gmail.

Targetseo.com (http://www.targetseo.com) one the leading top organic search engine optimization company provides Top Search Engine Ranking, Google Local Marketing, web 2.0 SEO Friendly Website Designing, Organic SEO Results, Google Adword PPC, Yahoo Search Marketing, Viral marketing, Advance Email Marketing, Lead Generation and Advance SEO / SEM Training - Please contact me on 91-9825326777 or send email me on seo@targetseo.com

PostHeaderIcon The 11 Rules To Grow Your SEO Business

1. As we look into the 21st century, leaders will be those who create leaders at all levels. Second line of the leadership shall be developing in the organization.

2. Narayana Murthy said, “Clean slip on a soft pillow is a policy at INFOSYS”. Doing business on the business is fair in the business. Good work and clarity in the communication and relations require.

3. Principles, Planet, Product, People and Profit are the 5 major pillars of the organization. Business that makes only profit is not a business.

4. Business leaders are gradually known as behavioral model and youth of the nation follows them with pride.

5. Walking on the talking. Ratan Tata said, “We have promised to the world that we will deliver a car in 2000$. So, we are doing it.”

6. Focus on core competency. Time management mathematics followed by a leader is 7*31*365.

7. Create uniqueness in the business. In any segment, you will find thousands of competitors. What is special in you? Your USP (Unique Selling Proposition) is branded gradually.

8. Control your calendar of 20% and 80%. 20% customers, who are offering and 80% profit to your business. These two areas should be your focus.

9. “These days, building the best server is not enough. That’s just the price of entry”, said Ann Liven, CEO Hewlett Packard. You are at your best. At any moment of a day, you cannot do better then your best.

10. Leadership is defined by results. Result is everything. No ‘because’, No ‘reasoning’, No ‘debate’ and No ‘arguments’, only strive to get ‘RESULT’.

11. Recently, President Obama has said, “I am screwed up.” Earlier his statement was “Yes, we can change”. Leadership is screwing up with time. It is never easy. Hopefully, everyday is a new and fresh challenge. Meeting and facing challenges and winning over them, is the essence of leadership.

http://www.targetseo.com one the leading seo company in india provides total seo services like organic search engine optimization, search engine marketing (PPC), Viral Marketing, Video Marketing, Lead Generation, Email Marketing, Blog Marketing, SEO Training and Total Web Portal Marketing and Optimization solution. - seo@targetseo.com

PostHeaderIcon TGRPL – SEO SEM Firm in India Launches website

Third Generation Resources Pvt. Ltd. (TGRPL), total business Solution Company, having offices in India and Canada, provides profit making solutions like marketing, management, training, IT solutions and branding services. The company is pleased to announce the launch of their new website especially designed to provide future generation services at present.

The software development team possesses the strength of Microsoft, .Net, PHP, Java and Portal development. They design, install, and provide an extra level of support and backing to the businesses; the company aims at the best software development support of par excellence rendered through experienced team of professionals.

TGRPL assures professional website design, development and maintenance services. It has a colossal pool of resources with technical expertise to develop websites of any complexity. They guarantee complete front-end and back-end development based website on the latest technologies and industry trends.

The company has good authentication in targeted email branding. Their team of seasoned media veterans ensures online marketing initiatives to next level. Tgrpl has an added feature of online bulk email service. Within short time it is going to launch bulk email marketing software.

They are the people who are keen to manage any event meticulously resulting in fabulous grand finale. Event Management is one of the specialties on their service platter. Management of any event whether it is marriage, birthday, corporate seminars, management workshops or any other they coherently work from the starting till the ending and confirms to make it a big success.

Portal development plays a significant role in the internet world. Portal puts presence before prospective millions in seconds. TGRPL channels leverage technology and creativity to build interactive, innovative and efficient portal solutions. The company’s technocrats manage to build portals keeping future requirements in focus.

Their professionals, with 2 to 8 years of experience in SEO and SEM field, are keen to take the site graph higher on search engines. Their prime motive is to get maximum traffic and to ensure business enquires to soar high. It also provides services such as Pay Per Click, Lead Generation Viral Marketing, Web Portal Marketing, Website Audit Analysis Report and SEO Training.

“The launch of our new website is really a great new look for us,” says Mr. Himanshu Shah, Director of TGRPL. He also adds, “Our team ensures to provide complete business solutions to our customers under one roof.

The offshore development company, TGRPL, is keen to develop outsourcing services in countries like USA, UK, Canada, European countries as well as Asian countries like Malaysia, Singapore, Dubai, etc. in near future. They have invited Outsourcing partnership contracts around the world for different projects and ventures.

About Third Generation Resources Pvt. Ltd. (TGRPL) http://www.development-india.com

Third Generation Resources Pvt. Ltd. (TGRPL), creating milestones in IT field, is managed by professionals possessing IT experience of more than two decades. The core strength of the management team lies in the entrepreneurial spirit which empowers them to manage rapid changes in the business activities and technologies.

PostHeaderIcon Topseos Ranks the Best SEO Firms for December 2008

Here’s the list of the top 30 Organic Optimization firms that are selected for December 2008:

1.   Bruce Clay Inc.
2.   Increase Visibility Inc.
3.   SEOP Inc.
4.   Intrapromote LLC.
5.   ArteWorks SEO
6.   SEO Image Inc.
7.   Portent Interactive
8.   Customer magnetism
9.   Direct Hit Solutions, Inc.
10.   Web.com Search Agency
11.   Yellow7 Interactive
12.   eVisibility Inc.
13.   SEO.com
14.   SEO Inc.
15.   eBrandz Inc.
16.   Getupdated Internet Marketing
17.   High Position Limited
18.   Weblinx Limited
19.   Sems
20.   Whoast Inc.
21.   iProspect
22.   1st of the List Promotion Inc.
23.   First Page SEO
24.   Infatex
25.   Reprise Media
26.   Inteliture
27.   Seer Interactive
28.   Trafficdeveloper
29.   Mannix Marketing
30.   RegisterEverywhere.com

The compilation of this list is subsequent to a detailed evaluation process. The list vouches for its reliability because of it strict selection process. Some questions asked to clients of the organic optimization firms for evaluation purposes are:

1   What are the most competitive keywords you have been able to rank on the major search engines and how long did it take you to achieve those rankings?
2   Did the agency modify the way they achieved higher rankings for you based on the Universal Search model introduced by Google? How?
3   How comprehensive, specific, and useful are the reports that are offered to the client? What metrics do they cover?

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

Targetseo.com - one the Leading search engine optimization firm in India provides organic search engine optimization, search engine marketing, viral marketing, advance seo training,  Email Marketing Lead Generation & Seo Friendly Website Designing Services - contact seo@targetseo.com

PostHeaderIcon World´s Best Internet World Records are Cleverly Disguised

Most of the world´s best are listed in the Guinness Book of World Records. The best motorcycle stunt ever performed, the best circus trick that will make your eye drop, and other best performances executed by extra-ordinary individuals.

But there is another “world´s best” that is not listed on Guinness Book of World Records.

And that is the world´s best Internet marketing tools.

Just like other existing industries, Internet marketing has its own set of the best marketing tools. If you are not new to the world of Internet marketing, many of these marketing tools are quite familiar to you—search engine optimization special software, content management services, affiliate marketing programs, auto responders, and others.

And the list continues to expand as the industry grows over the years.

However, Internet marketing possesses other non-traditional and effective marketing tools that you should know to maximize your potentials as Internet marketers. Some of these marketing tools are said to be “cleverly disguised”, yet these are the world´s best online marketing tools that you can integrate to your online business system.

Here is the quick rundown of the world´s best Internet marketing tools and some pointers in using it with your preferred system.

DOMAIN NAME- you will not easily notice it, but domain name is the first best Internet marketing tool that you must remember. Picking the right domain name will gear your way towards success yet getting it wrong will tell you that your game is over.

What are the things that you should consider when picking up your own domain name? First, you should pick a short, memorable, and keyword-relevant domain name. Picking a domain name that is relevant to your main keyword/s will help you in getting high search engine page ranking of your website. Moreover, it can be an ideal promotional tool, giving a hint to your potential clients what your website is exactly all about.

Internet marketing experts suggests that you set up a particular server for your domain. One server will only carry one domain. Web hosting companies typically have your domain name co-hosting hundreds of domains on a single server. Since all domains are under the same server, this may result to adverse consequences especially if one of the domains is allegedly spamming or behaving unscrupulously. Thus, it is wise that you have a separate IP address for each domain name.

KEYWORDS- it is what Internet researchers type into search engines to locate the information or things that they are looking for. These are one of the most important elements on any online-based marketing venture. Thus, you need to pick the right keywords and you are on your way towards success.

How you will find useful keywords for your Internet marketing business? You must have special keyword research tool or online keyword generator that will help you pick the right keywords. Such tools will supply useful information such as number of searches made monthly, the degree of competition, and the websites that targeting such keywords. Make this as your guide to get targeted traffic to your site that will patronize your products and/or services.

ARTICLES- marketing your website largely depends on organic SEO strategies. One simple strategy is to write and submit keyword-relevant articles to article directories and Internet publishers. As articles directories and Internet publishers displays your articles, you will be able to gain valuable links back to your website. Search engines follow these links and rank your website according to the keywords incorporated on these articles. Maximize the potential of your articles and bring the targeted traffic to your website.

LIST- any Internet marketing system is supported by list. This is a huge database of contacts or individuals who have given you permission to communicate with them through email or newsletter. Most Internet marketers are keeping various databases for each product that they are targeting. Aside from emails and newsletters, you must also set up a list of affiliates that can help you promote and sell your products to your clients. Once you have acquired a huge list of loyal subscribers and affiliates, the door of opportunities will now follow.

Utilize the world´s best Internet marketing tools and see a bright future ahead of your online business career.

http://www.targetseo.com leading search engine optimization and search marketing firm in India provides total E-marketing solution for all Industry, services including, Organic SEO, Search Engine Marketing, Viral Marketing and Email Marketing solution - please send your email at seo @ targetseo.com

PostHeaderIcon MeetTheFamous.com - New Celebrity Website Launches

MeetTheFamous.com has announced the launch of its new website: the first and only to pay users who break celebrity news. The site is already creating a buzz amid celebrity gossip enthusiasts with its tagline: “Where You are the Paparazzi!”

MeetTheFamous.com takes a fundamentally different approach to celebrity gossip because 100% of the content is created by users instead of relying on mainstream news sources. The result is countless first person experiences, good and bad, that feature the biggest celebrities in the world.
“I started MeetTheFamous.com because so many people witness celebrity news breaking on a daily basis. Aside from tipping off the gossip sites or news outlets, they don’t have anything to do with their photos or stories and then they go relatively unnoticed,” said Jordan Osher, CEO and Founder of MeetTheFamous.com. “I saw a need in the celebrity news industry and filled that void with a fully interactive celebrity website that actually pays its users for breaking celebrity news.”
In its first week, MeetTheFamous.com has already seen 10,000 visitors submit over 1,000 user generated celebrity news stories like “Donald Trump is Orange…Literally,” “Scarlett (Johansson) is one Transtastic Starlet” and “I Witnessed Jessica Simpson Take a Stand for Autism.” Other famous faces already featured on the site include Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and George Clooney. In total, over 600 celebrities have been showcased on MeetTheFamous.com thus far.

PostHeaderIcon Search Engine Optimization India Benefit

In the era of the internet, a web presence is a pre-requisite if you want a successful innings in the highly competitive world of business. However having a website is not enough; website optimization is of critical importance. Successful search engine optimization is the proverbial key to success, when it comes to internet marketing, online advertising, and a superior internet presence.

Returns on Investment

The high returns on investment are a result of increased brand visibility and highly targeted website traffic. This results in an increase of sales of your products, which is actually why people carry out search engine optimization in the first place. If you want to market your product, then there can be no better way to do this, then by using SEO services. It’s cost effective and also a long term option, if a particular website confirms to superior website design and optimization.

It scores highly over all other internet marketing options like Pay per Click etc.

Ongoing Promotion

The great thing about search engine optimization is that the promotion never stops. It’s an ongoing process that continues even as you sleep. You just work on the core requisites and put them into place; and your online advertising campaign will be ready to go 24×7. Yes, you definitely need to make periodic changes to your optimization but on the whole you don’t need to monitor the process all the time.

Cross Browser Compatibility

It’s important that your website be seen by the largest number of visitors, which essentially are your potential customers. People use various types of browser when they use the internet. This means that your website should be accessible on all kinds of browsers. This is also one of the benefits offered by search engine optimization and this optimization is offered across all browsers.

It takes the validation to all new standards altogether thus optimizing your website for the future.
Search Engine Navigability

The reason why you undertake search engine optimization is to enable the crawling of search engine spiders through the website. Therefore, what SEO does is that it increases the functionality of the web pages in a way such that your website and its web pages can be easily accessed by search engine spiders.

This helps in the proper categorization and indexing of your website by the search engines.

At the end of the day, the process of optimization is all about going one up over your competitors. It’s also about achieving greater brand visibility in what we can call the global internet marketplace. It will help your business compete and also stay ahead in the race.

A high search engine ranking will go a long way in improving the visibility of a particular company, thus aiding its success. Moreover, you also attract potential customers who will have genuine interest in your products. This would save a lot of time and wasted effort. All in all a good bargain for a business either big or small. No wonder, that it is scaling the popularity charts.

http://www.targetseo.com - Offer Search Engine Optimization in India, also offer Search Marketing, Advance SEO Training,  Viral Marketing and Total Web Traffic Solution for all online business. mail on seo@targetseo.com

PostHeaderIcon Ledership 2020 - Top Management Training Programme India

Train the Trainer Workshop in IndiaKnowledge Inc. premier management training organization, is pleased to announce the one day training SEMINAR on October 4th, 2008 at Hotel Grand Bhagwati, S. G. Road, Ahmedabad, India, mentored by Dr.Shailesh Thaker – Management Guru India

“Leadership for 2020 “ Training program is designed to give the next-generation of managers a higher-level understanding of what it takes to be a professional Leader. The workshop is designed to provide insight for managers who need to become powerful leaders with professionalism.

This work shop is best for Top Managers, CEO.s Hr Professionals, Entrepreneurs, MD’s of MNC’s. They will have great advantage to create new vision for future leaders for 2020

Why you should participate?

Because professional employees at all levels of an organization will be more likely to keep their commitments, work cooperatively and build rapport and trust with their subordinates.This powerful training program includes everything a leader r needs to successfully deliver a high-impact full day workshop This comprehensive program is a complete guide to leadership to add values and conviction of specific significance to a participant’s organization

Leadership is demonstration and not Definition

Influencing circle leadership
The Importance of Emotional Leadership
Making NSI part of your DNA
Know your Mentors and Models
Making people really die for you
Leaders live with keys and not locks
Punish mediocre success and appreciate total failure

OUT COME OF THE SEMINAR

• In today’s business, everyone needs to show leadership - whether they run a company or work on the front line. your entire organization should be empowered to:
• Result oriented attitude Self driven. Focus your future. Value addition to product, team, organization.” Said by Dr. Thaker.

ABOUT Dr. Shailesh Thaker

He is the world-reno 0wned management guru on organizational behaviour. He is the CLO of Knowledge inc., a highly regarded training firm that helps organisations such as PHILIPS, KOTAK, TORRENT POWER, HABIB BANK, GILLET, HINO MOTORS, SITARA , JOHNSON & JOHNSON AND L & T, LIC, BAJAJ ALIANZ, DOSHION, WAGHBAKRI, and INTAS to achieve international bench mark . In the recent year he has made up a presentation in IFTDO as a guest speaker at Dubai and he has been invited to speak at the prestigious business schools S P JAIN , IBA, CBM, AMA, IIPM, NIFT, NED, And KARANCHI UNIVERSITY to motivate professionals.

Knowledge inc.one of the leading management training inc. is currently running management Development program for the CEO of the organizations . Overwhelming response is receive from the business houses .24 CEO’s are learning through the program. World renown business coach Dr. Atthree, Rooshikumar Pandya, G. Balachandrn, Dr. Charles Savage and many more from Italy, Germany, Malaysia, Dubai, Bahrain are going to speak in the program “ CREATING IN HOUSE MENTOR.”Dr. Thaker is a chief Mentor of the program.

PostHeaderIcon UK search marketing spend ‘to reach £330m in 2008′

British organisations will spend £2.75 billion on search engine marketing (SEM) activities this year, according to a new publication.

This represents an increase of 24 per cent compared with last year, E-consultancy’s Search Engine Marketing Buyer’s Guide said, according to Precision Marketing.

Breaking this down, the report said that search engine optimisation spending will rise 32 per cent to reach £330 million by the end of 2006, while pay-per-click expenditure will see growth of 23 per cent to hit £2.24 billion.

Despite this double-digit growth, it is not as high as the increases recorded in previous years, something that may be attributable to the slowing economy, E-consultancy editor-in-chief Chris Lake remarked.

However, he added: “Consumer internet usage is flattening out, but the sector is certainly more robust than other media channels that have a less measurable return on investment and should continue to grow for years to come.”

Mark Jackson of Search Engine Watch recently commented that the level of spending going to organic and paid search appears to be somewhat disproportionate considering research suggesting that up to 70 per cent of all search engine click-throughs occur in organic listings.

News brought to you by http://www.targetseo.com - One the Leading seo and search marketing firm in India provides SEO Services & Pay Per Click strategies

Also Provides SEO Friendly Web Designing, SEO Content Writing, Software Development, Web Development and Complete B2b B2c Portal Solution. - seo@targetseo.com for more details.

PostHeaderIcon Top 30 Skills Every IT Person Needs

An IT manager’s guide on how to be better at what you do, no matter how experienced you are.

1. Be able to fix basic PC issues. These can be how to map a printer, back up files, or add a network card. You don’t need to be an expert and understand how to overclock a CPU or hack the registry, but if you work in IT, people expect you to be able to do some things.

2. Work the help desk. Everyone, from the CIO to the senior architect, should be able to sit down at the help desk and answer the phones. Not only will you gain a new appreciation for the folks on the phones, but you will also teach them more about your process and avoid escalations in the future.

3. Do public speaking. At least once, you should present a topic to your peers. It can be as simple as a five-minute tutorial on how IM works, but being able to explain something and being comfortable enough to talk in front of a crowd is a skill you need to have. If you are nervous, partner with someone who is good at it, or do a roundtable. This way, if you get flustered, someone is there to cover for you.

4. Train someone. The best way to learn is to teach.

5. Listen more than you speak. I very rarely say something I didn’t already know, but I often hear other people say things and think, “Darn, I wish I knew that last week.”

6. Know basic networking. Whether you are a network engineer, a help desk technician, a business analyst, or a system administrator, you need to understand how networks work and simple troubleshooting. You should understand DNS and how to check it, as well as how to ping and trace-route machines.
7. Know basic system administration. Understand file permissions, access levels, and why machines talk to the domain controllers. You don’t need to be an expert, but knowing the basics will avoid many headaches down the road.

8. Know how to take a network trace. Everyone in IT should be able to fire up wireshark, netmon, snoop, or some basic network capturing tool. You don’t need to understand everything in it, but you should be able to capture it to send to a network engineer to examine.

9. Know the difference between latency and bandwidth. Latency is the amount of time to get a packet back and forth; bandwidth is the maximum amount of data a link can carry. They are related, but different. A link with high-bandwidth utilization can cause latency to go higher, but if the link isn’t full, adding more bandwidth can’t reduce latency.

10. Script. Everyone should be able to throw a script together to get quick results. That doesn’t mean you’re a programmer. Real programmers put in error messages, look for abnormal behavior, and document. You don’t need to do that, but you should be able to put something together to remove lines, send e-mail, or copy files.

11. Back up. Before you do anything, for your own sake, back it up.

12. Test backups. If you haven’t tested restoring it, it isn’t really there. Trust me.

13. Document. None of the rest of us wants to have to figure out what you did. Write it down and put it in a location everyone can find. Even if it’s obvious what you did or why you did it, write it down.

14. Read “The Cuckoo’s Egg.” I don’t get a cut from Cliff Stoll (the author), but this is probably the best security book there is — not because it is so technical, but because it isn’t.

15. Work all night on a team project. No one likes to do this, but it’s part of IT. Working through a hell project that requires an all-nighter to resolve stinks, but it builds very useful camaraderie by the time it is done.

16. Run cable. It looks easy, but it isn’t. Plus, you will understand why installing a new server doesn’t really take five minutes — unless, of course, you just plug in both ends and let the cable fall all over the place. Don’t do that — do it right. Label all the cables (yes, both ends), and dress them nice and neat. This will save time when there’s a problem because you’ll be able to see what goes where.

17. You should know some energy rules of thumb. For example: A device consuming 3.5kW of electricity requires a ton of cooling to compensate for the heat. And I really do mean a ton, not merely “a lot.” Note that 3.5kW is roughly what 15 to 20 fairly new 1U and 2U servers consume. One ton of cooling requires three 10-inch-round ducts to handle the air; 30 tons of air requires a duct measuring 80 by 20 inches. Thirty tons of air is a considerable amount.

18. Manage at least one project. This way, the next time the project manager asks you for a status, you’ll understand why. Ideally, you will have already sent the status report because you knew it would be asked for.

19. Understand operating costs versus capital projects. Operating costs are the costs to run the business. Capital equipment is made of assets that can have their cost spread over a time period — say, 36 months. Operating costs are sometimes better, sometimes worse. Know which one is better — it can make a difference between a yes and no.

20. Learn the business processes. Being able to spot improvements in the way the business is run is a great technique for gaining points. You don’t need to use fancy tools; just asking a few questions and using common sense will serve you well.

21. Don’t be afraid to debate something you know is wrong. But also know when to stop arguing. It’s a fine line between having a good idea and being a pain in the ass.

22. If you have to go to your boss with a problem, make sure you have at least one solution.

23. There is no such thing as a dumb question, so ask it … once. Then write down the answer so that you don’t have to ask it again. If you ask the same person the same question more than twice, you’re an idiot (in their eyes).

24. Even if it takes you twice as long to figure something out on your own versus asking someone else, take the time to do it yourself. You’ll remember it longer. If it takes more than twice as long, ask.

25. Learn how to speak without using acronyms.

26. IT managers: Listen to your people. They know more than you. If not, get rid of them and hire smarter people. If you think you are the smartest one, resign.

27. IT managers: If you know the answer, ask the right questions for someone else to get the solution; don’t just give the answer. This is hard when you know what will bring the system back up quickly and everyone in the company is waiting for it, but it will pay off in the long run. After all, you won’t always be available.
28. IT managers: The first time someone does something wrong, it’s not a mistake — it’s a learning experience. The next time, though, give them hell. And remember: Every day is a chance for an employee to learn something else. Make sure they learn something valuable versus learning there’s a better job out there.

29. IT managers: Always give people more work than you think they can handle. People will say you are unrealistic, but everyone needs something to complain about anyway, so make it easy. Plus, there’s nothing worse than looking at the clock at 2 p.m. and thinking, “I’ve got nothing to do, but can’t leave.” This way, your employees won’t have that dilemma.

30. IT managers: Square pegs go in square holes. If someone works well in a team but not so effectively on their own, keep them as part of a team.

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